I Slept With A DVD Player Because My Heart Is Two Sizes Too Small

Pick the month you were born:

January- I crapped
February- I slapped
March- I murdered
April- I looked at
May- I masturbated with
June- I slept with
July- I laughed at
August- I stabbed
September- I shot
October- I made love to
November- I wrestled
December- I had sex with

Now pick the day of your birth
1. A prostitute
2. An Asian
3. A Woman with HIV
4. A drunken black man
5. Santa Clause
6. A playboy bunny
7. A married mom
8. My stuffed bunny
9. Your mom
10. The Easter Bunny
11. A football player
12. A porn star
13. My lettermans Jacket
14. My teacher
15. The Rock
16. A DVD player
17. A pencil sharpener
18. The phone
19. My computer
20. Your house
21. The tape measurer
22. The Lamp
23. The pope
24. Governor Swartenegar
25. Mr. Incredible
26. A transvestite
27. The Devil
28. Your hot sister
29. George Bush
30. A tape recorder
31. The printer

Now the THIRD letter of your LAST name
A- Because I like chocolate
B- Because I was bored
C- Because my pants were on too tight
D- Because I am a homosexual
E- Because my heart is two sizes too small
F- Because I didnt get any presents for Christmas
G- Because I like eggs
H- Because the world will end tomorrow
I- Because I slit my wrists
J- Because I dont have a bf/gf
K- Because I like football
L- Because I was high
M- Because I was drunk
N- Because my mom told me to
O- Because fruit cakes fly
P- Because Im lonely
Q- Because my parents fight a lot
R- Because Im horny
S- Because I want to commit suicide
T- Because I hate school
U- Because I was drunk
V- Because I love slumber parties
W- Because it calms me
X- Because I like brownies
Y- Because I like to spoon
Z- Because I need to masturbate